Monday, May 30, 2011

Some Lifted Burden

I took a road trip this weekend and listened to this book on tape and it really lifted some burden off of my heart and spoke to me in a different way so I wanted to share.  I tried to organize this so it is easy to read but I had to cut and slice lines together in order for it to make sense to someone who was not reading the book.  

  • “Play your part and don’t worry about what others do.  Believe that God also speaks to them and that they are as engaged as you are in discovering the meaning of life.”
  • “We are all sailors on an unknown sea, may he make us brave enough to accept this mystery.”


“We will never ever know the ultimate reason for our existence.  We might know the how, where, and when of being here, but the why will always be a question that remains unanswered.  The main objective of the great Architect of the Universe is known to Him alone and no one else.  99% of the people on this planet are, in their own way, struggling with that very question, why are we here?  Many think they found the answer in religion or in materialism; others despair and spend their lives and their money trying to grasp the meaning of it all.  A few let the question go unanswered and live for the moment, regardless of the results or consequences.  Only the brave are aware that the only possible answer to the question is, “I don’t know”.  This might at first seem frightening, leaving us terribly vulnerable in our dealings with the world, with the things of the world, and with our own sense of existence.  Once we’ve gotten over that initial fear, however, we gradually become accustomed to the only possible solution, to follow our dreams.  Having the courage to take the steps we’ve always wanted to take is the only way of showing that we trust in God.  As soon as we except this life takes on a sacred meaning, and we experience the same emotion the virgin must have felt when one afternoon in her otherwise very ordinary existence, a strange appeared to her and made her an offer, “Be it onto me according to thy word” said the virgin, because she understood that the greatest thing a human being could do was to except the mystery.  The only way they could truly participate was by following their own desires, their own dreams,  because that is how man becomes an instrument of God.  We don’t look for an answer, we accept, and then life becomes much more intense, much more brilliant, because we understand that each minute, each step that we take  has a meaning that goes far beyond us as individuals.  We realize that somewhere in time and space this question does have an answer; we realize that there is a reason for us being here, and for us that is enough.  We plunge into the dark night with faith.  We surrender ourselves fully to each moment knowing that there is always a hand to guide us.  And whether we accept it or not is entirely up to us.” 

“She didn’t have the same advantages as the crucified man before her, who had known what his mission was, because He was the son of God.  He had never made a mistake.  He had never known ordinary human love, only love for His Father.  All he needed to do was to reveal His wisdom and teach humankind the truth path to heaven. 
But was that all?  She remembered a Sunday catechism class, when the priest had been more inspired that usual.  They’d been studying the episode when Jesus, sweating blood, was praying to God and asking Him to remove the cup from which he was being forced to drink.   But why, if he already knew he was the son of God?” asked the priest. “Because he only knew it with his heart. If he was absolutely sure, his mission would be meaningless, because he would not be entirely human. Being human means having doubts and yet still continuing on your path.
She looked again at the image and for the first time in her entire life, felt closer to it. There perhaps was a man, frightened and alone, facing death and asking “Father, Father, why has thou forsaken me?”  If he said that, it was because even He wasn’t sure where He was going.  He had taken a chance and plunged, as all men do, into the Dark Night, knowing that he would only find the answer at the end of his journey.  He, too, had to go through the anxiety of making decisions, of leaving His father and mother and His little village to go in search of the secrets of men and the mysteries of the Law.”
            He had known people, wine, bread, parties, and all the beauties of the world.  It was impossible that HE had not also known the love of a woman, which is why he had sweated blood on the Mount of Olives, because having known the love of one person, it was very hard to leave the Earth and to sacrifice Himself for the love of all men.  He had experience everything the world could offer and yet He continued on his journey, knowing that the Dark Night could end on the cross or on the pyre.
            Lord, we’re all in the world to run the risks of that Dark Night.  I’m afraid of death, but even more afraid of wasting my life.  I’m afraid of love, because it involves things that are beyond our understanding; it sheds such a brilliant light, but the shadow it casts frightens me.
            “He had played his part and shown to the world that, if everyone played their part, no one else would have to suffer, because he had suffered for all those who’d had the courage to fight for their dreams.”

BRIDA BY PAULO COELHO

Monday, May 16, 2011

Ron Paul! Ron Paul! 2012

I have never been a very political person, and perhaps that is due to my young age, but now that I see my future being impacted in such a great magnitude by what happens in the next few years I really am beginning to worry.  I have debated back and forth between PA school and medical school.  With obamacare on the brinks of our society I will never go to medical school.  Patients aren't happy now and neither are doctors.  With obamacare everything will just get worse.  I hate to say it but being a doctor is simply not worth it.  I love medicine and will practice it another way as a PA, but as long as we are heading towards socialized medicine I never will go to medical school.  I will say this though, if Ron Paul is elected president, that day I will apply to medical school.

http://www.ronpaul.com/on-the-issues/health-care/

Sunday, May 15, 2011

The Legacy Begins!

Champions league qualification for the first time ever, and FA cup champions for the first time in 35 years!  The legacy begins!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

To Be, or Not to Be, That Is Always the Question

Had a long debate today with one of my friends about the pros and cons of medical school and pa school.  I won't go into them for the sole purpose of no one would read this if I did, but she is an advocate of me going to medical school and I am not.  The last year I have struggled immensely with the choice between the two careers and my future.  The bottom line is it comes down to this.  I love medicine, I want to make it a huge part of my life and dedicate myself to giving people second chances.  But, in 60 years when I'm looking back at my life I don't want to associate myself as just being a doctor.  I want so much more out of life.  To become and MD I would not even be able to start my life until my mid 30's hopefully.  I am not saying I am not dedicated because I will always try to gain as much knowledge about medicine as I can, but to be able to finish school early and continually gain knowledge and insight into medicine as I practice for the rest of my life while at the same time being able to travel, see the world, have a family, and make memories, is in my view the perfect route.  I have to remind myself quite often why I am choosing PA over MD.  When I am 60, 70, 80 years old, I want to know I lived my life to the fullest and experienced as much as I could have.  To those people who do go through the rigorous trials of becoming an MD, I solute you, but it's not for me.  Their are many aspects of life.  Juggling between them can be difficult at times.  Learning to keep a balance between it all is the only way anyone can survive.    

    

Saturday, May 7, 2011

What if...

What if certain dreams, ideas, and parts of our imagination are all connections to a past life...
Having a random conversation yesterday with a co worker, whom I just like to play devils advocate with, we started talking about dreams and I told her that this idea might not be so far fetched!  I mean dreams and certain things are totally unexplainable by science and some have no coherent interweaving with our life so who knows...  
I believe in God and an afterlife but I can not say for certain what that afterlife will be like because as far as I know it's been 2000+ years since the last person came back from the grave and gave us a clear idea of what happens next.  I'm sure I would be cursed and stoned to claim myself a believer yet have such a far fetched idea, but when I truly reached an understanding and acceptance of God I admitted to myself that I will never know or understand how or why things work the way they do.  To claim you know something like that for a fact would be ignorant in my opinion because in all of God's complexity I highly doubt their is anything we truly understand.  That is my random thought for the day, go ponder it!

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

You Know It or You Don't

I have been reading and studying for my final tomorrow for about 4 hours straight now.  I guess I'm to the point I either know it or I don't.  I'm worried about getting a C in the class but I honestly feel their is nothing else I could have done.  I guess if all comes to worse I will have to postpone my graduation date just until the summer and work my ass off in the spring semester to replace the grade.  I know in the end it's not a big deal because I'm young and have time but damn after 5 years of college I'm just ready to move on to the next chapter of my life, and it feels like I am being forever postponed by something.  I guess I need to enjoy the journey and not worry so much about the plan.  Knowing my luck though the day I graduate the world will come to an end...I'll be sure to let everyone know the date =)

=extreme headache and stress

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Hoping for Some Success In Failure

Decided to skip my last class this morning and just lay in bed and do nothing.  Felt great.  Have a CPR class tonight then the day off tomorrow so I can read 100 pages of my biology book!  School has really been wearing me down this semester.  What I don't understand are the teachers who seem to have the sole purpose of making you fail...I mean I'm paying over $1100 per class and I have teachers that delight in the fact that their students don't comprehend material and fail exams.  That's pitiful to me and I pray I will never get my kicks out of the downfall of others.  Anyhow this is my hardest semester and after that I am down to only psychology and physiology classes so I am pretty stoked to start learning about the human body some more!  I'm off to watch an episode of Avatar: The Last Airbender before work so take care my fellow bloggers (I guess fellow blogger)....

Monday, May 2, 2011

"Inside the Whale" By Jon Langford



Inside the whale
We saw a better world just around the corner
Time’s arrow pointing down some happy trails
Big clear dreams arising over the event horizon
But no light escapes
From inside the whale
Long blue summer nights, some basic human rights
The lunar landing craft, a donkey’s ear and tail
All swallowed up as midnight struck
It’s so dark down here
Inside the whale
An end to hunger, equality
Under the sea
Inside the whale
Progress, progress, rose tinted glasses
cock-eyed optimism all cracked and paled
And all the astronauts and the Kennedys got caught
Down in the depths
Inside the whale
So naive, this white boy’s dream
Tucked up in bed
Inside the whale


Was in Austin over spring break and ran across this guys work in a little store he owns down there and really enjoyed them.

Amazing Piece of the Cartoon Series "The Avatar"



The movie was a disgrace but the cartoon series is pretty amazing.  My friend and I watched it with great intent so I recommend it to everyone of all ages!  I ran across this picture looking something up and thought it was pretty schweeet...yes I'm a 5 year old trapped in a 22 year old body w/e to tha haters